Shiver me Tinder

Given the surplus of #SingleGirlProblems on Twitter, the internet’s overwhelming obsession with cats, and the fact that wine ice cream even exists, it’s pretty clear that the world is made up of single ladies (cue Beyoncé). If you feel like Johnny Lee circa 1980 and are lookin’ for love in all the wrong places, maybe it’s time you tried a little TLC: Tinder Loving Care. Continue reading

Lies Carrie Bradshaw Told Me

#confusion

#confusion

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The Biggest Big Boob Problem

You’ve probably noticed that I’m a pretty controversial figure online. You know, always trying to rock the proverbial boat by posting about taboo topics, like which wine stains your teeth the most and what happened on last week’s episode of The Walking Dead. Once I mentioned having trouble finding Twizzlers in Europe and the internet totally freaked out on me. Anyway, today I’m going to get even dirtier and talk about something completely NSFW, which means you should definitely keep reading. Continue reading

I’m new around here…

Living in New York must be an acquired skill, because everyone who lives here appears to be really good at it. It seems to me that New Yorkers all have heels that don’t give them blisters, umbrellas that don’t get all inside out every time the wind blows, and cool accents that make them sound way tougher than my southern drawl ever could. Oh, and did I mention that they wear all black and look effortlessly chic all the time?

Oscar Wilde (supposedly) said, “You can never be overdressed or overeducated.” Yeah, I’m going to go ahead and say that I proved Mr. Wilde wrong on that one. Continue reading

The Graduate

Long time no see! The thing is, I haven’t had much time to post because I’ve just been so busy hanging out with my celebrity friends. The life of the rich and famous isn’t as easy as it looks.

Picture 14 ^^^Isn’t it so weird that so many people retweeted Ellen’s picture of me?

A lot has happened since you last heard from me…
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Le Noctilien: FAQ

Because you know anything’s better than walking alone. tumblr_ma1ywtMsyx1rpt3hd

1. Who takes the night bus? tumblr_menynoMATZ1ryf8if
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Working Girl

I’ve come to a conclusion:AAAAAvtUjSoAAAAAAEdfhg
…or maybe just not in logistics. It may come as a surprise to you, but I don’t think that locating missing freight is my passion.
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