It’s time to face the strange ch-ch-changes (thanks, DB): I’m back. For real.
I know you scholars probably saw “Lucy in Limbo” and were like, Lucy’s hanging with the virtuous pagans and guiltless damned, what? Sorry, English majors, but I’m not going all Dante Alighieri on you just yet.
No, the state of uncertainty in which I find myself does not arise from the vestibule of Hell but from the adverse forces of Paris and Tennessee. This is no longer Lucy in Paris: it’s Lucy in Limbo. Or should it be Lucy dans l’incertitude… See what I mean?! 
I’m constantly under the strain of the opposing influences of two completely different cultures! Can I wear all black? But what if that’s all that I have? I need a glass of wine. What do you mean, you need to “see my ID”? Oh, right, that’s a thing. But it’s okay if I smoke in here, right?
Being a broad might have been better abroad…
As Blog is My Witness 