When we imagine French women, we think long, lean, chic…à la Françoise Hardy.
And when we imagine French food, we think bread, cheese, butter…à la croque-monsieur.
Hold up. Is it just me, or do those two trains of thought seem incompatible? Like do they expect us to believe that SHE ate THAT? Clearly something doesn’t add up here. Continue reading
Because you know anything’s better than walking alone.
1. Who takes the night bus?
You act all…
But really you’re like…
Oui, karaoke was all the rage in Cannes (les français just couldn’t get enough of us! <<<<so we thought…), but I have yet to encounter it in Paris. If anyone knows any good spots, holla at me.
Oui, Halloween exists here.
Non, les français don’t dress up.
And there is obviously no Halloween candy to be found…those skinny bitches.
Non, the French really aren’t into beurre de cacahuètes. They usually have it in the foreign food aisle, which cracks me up first of all, but they only have kind of janky brands, no Jif.
I asked a French girl about it, and she said that peanut butter is really bad for you. I was like, qoui? Putting ham and cheese and butter on bread is just as many calories as PB and J. She said, “Yes, but you’d rather have ham and cheese and butter.” No, what? Anyway, they eat Nutella the same way we eat peanut butter, like with bananas, on bread in the morning, etc.
Nutella:France as PB:Amurica
When in Paris, blackout or get out.
If wearing all black is wrong, I don’t want to be right. Don’t wear any colors or people might think you’re happy. Just kidding, but really.
Just remember, BLACK is the new black. Black goes with everything. When in doubt, wear black. Sure, you might look slightly goth, but hey, you’ll look Parisian.
**photos of Paris Vogue team**
Oui, taking an afternoon nap, or faire une sieste, is a very Frenchy thing to do.
The stereotypical French woman (or European woman, really) is pretty, but like ACTUALLY pretty. Naturally pretty. She’s thin, chic, and fabulous on her own. She doesn’t need a flat iron or makeup or even a bra.
What’s Frenchier than going sans bra? If you studied French in Action in high school, the boys in your class probably obsessed over the fact that Mireille (who, as it turns out, is a PORN STAR, but that’s another story) NEVER wore one.
So naturally, you would think that going out without a bra is just another step towards looking like a vrai Parisian, right? Like wearing all black or drinking espresso. Wrong. French women don’t wear bras because French women don’t have giant boobs. And actually French women do wear bras. So no, going sans bra probably won’t help you achieve your goal of looking like a real live French person, but hey, why not try it anyway?
The night Kat and I tested this theory…