Category Archives: Salopes Aiment Ceci

Even French Bitches Love This

When you meet a guy at Duplex…

First you’re like…1zl92fn Continue reading

Lucy the Elf, what’s your favorite couleur?

I’ve always felt like I could relate to Buddy the Elf.

My idea of a perfect date...

My idea of a perfect date…


But in Paris, I’ve really empathized with this guy more than ever!

À la Sorbonne, where the other students are all a. 17 years old, and b. Parisian, i.e. 1/2 my size.

À la Sorbonne, where the other students are all a. 17 years old, and b. Parisian, i.e. 1/2 my size.


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The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!DownloadedFile_2
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VDM

VDM is the French version of FML.

It stands for Vie de Merde, and the site contains vos histoires de la vie quotidienne (your everyday life stories). Their slogan is “Ma vie c’est de la merde, et je vous emmerde,” which kind of means “My life is sh*t, and I don’t give a f*ck.” This isn’t a direct translation. Technically it means “My life, it’s of sh*t, and I f*ck you,” but somehow I don’t think that’s exactly what the French are trying to say. Either way, it’s a little more harsh than FML’s subtitle, which is “Get the guts to spill the beans.”
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Bouledogues et Bébés

Should small children be allowed in formal settings or not…it’s one of those controversial social topics, much like gay marriage or the sanctity of life. Normally I consider myself pretty liberal in these areas (healthcare for all! let them get married!), but this is where I draw the line: do not bring a screaming infant into a fancy restaurant!

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Quoting Mean Girls

I’d like to start off with a question: What is the limit to the number of times you can accurately answer a question with a quote from Mean Girls?

If you didn’t immediately shout, “The limit does not exist!” well…YOU CAN’T SIT WITH US!!!!

If there’s ever an awkward silence, you can usually look to Tina Fey for guidance.

It can be used to explain cultural phenomena.

Also, Mean Girls and politics go together like PB and J gin and tonic!

Even Walt Disney knew joining the mathletes was social suicide…

In France, Mean Girls is called Lolita Malgré Moi. I know, right? So weird.

Like, how do you say, “Trang Pak is a grotsky little byotch” en Français?

Harrods

I’m in love. His name is Harrod.

As much as I would love to say that the Houses of Parliament or St Paul’s was my favorite part of London, alas, my heart belongs to Harrods. It is a truly magical place. I guess this is how kids feel when they go to Disney after their parents get divorced… #rightofpassage

It’s like I finally understand what Belinda Carlisle was singing about in 1987.

    Ooh, Balmain, do you know what that’s worth?
    Compared to Harrods, Bon Marché’s the worst,
    They say at Harrods, bears come first,
    A milkshake from Harrods can quench your thirst,
    Ooh, Harrods is a place on Earth!

If you think I’m exaggerating, listen to this: you can take a break from your shopping spree at the Ice Cream Parlour, complete with a milk shake bar.

You’re probably thinking, “This sounds like Christmas morning!” Well as a matter of fact…

They don’t celebrate Thanksgiving in London, oddly enough, so after, like, labor day, they jump straight into Christmas!

Harrods has something for everyone! Even a Mackenzie-Childs room, where your mom can buy more turtle pots that your dad will probably arrange to look like they’re procreating! What, that doesn’t happen at your house?

Still think I’m being a drama queen? (Me, dramatic? Never!) Wait ‘till you hear this. There’s a Pizzeria, where the chefs–wait for it–SING OPERA. No joke. They literally belt it out while they’re tossing your dough.

But wait, there’s more. What is this, my birthday? One of the escalators (because there are several) is Egyptian themed and called the Egyptian Escalator. Now, not only can you walk like an Egyptian, but ride like one too!

Even the bathrooms at Harrods are superior. They have actual perfume. Not like cheap bathroom cologne, oh no, we’re talking Chanel and Prada quality scents. Can’t go walkin’ around Harrods smellin’ cheap.

Remember that scene in the Parent Trap when Lilo is like “I’m Hallie,” and Natasha Richardson is like, “People say you’re a mother-less California freak who is a less hot version of your twin sister Annie” “Let’s spend the rest of the day getting lost in Harrods”? Well that’s how Nanner and I spent Saturday afternoon. No, really, this is how I found her…

They should really take before and after pics of people at Harrods. Walking in, looking solemn, and leaving, looking like John Stamos just said you were pretty.

Oh, that awkward moment when your post about Harrods is longer than your post about the entire city of London